Clean Enough for Madonna?

For those of you readers who don't know me personally (all two of you), I have a very vivid and bizarre dream life.  For example, last night I had a dream that Madonna (the material girl, not the virgin) was my house guest.  I hadn't been expecting her, so my house was in pretty pathetic shape.  For some reason, I wasn't worried about this.  I think I was in shock that Madonna showed up in the first place.  It started to sink in at breakfast the next morning how ill-prepared I was.  I offered her bacon (as if!), and she politely declined. I offered her eggs, she politely declined.  I offered her pancakes, she politely declined.  Then I started wracking my brain about what the heck her crazy macrobiotic diet was all about.  Fail.  Then I followed her back to the guestroom, where I started to notice how utterly dirty and cluttered the place was.  Madonna hadn't said anything the first night, so I told myself it wasn't as bad as it looked.  Then she started telling me in a very positive life-affirming way that cleaning things up would make me feel better.  So while she took a shower, I picked up.  And it looked better.  And I felt better.  The end.

When Madonna is entering my dreams to lecture me on keeping a clean house, perhaps it's time to step up my game.